In which Handlebar tells an irrelevant story.
A gentleman called Parluk arrives in Fort Kerium, claiming to be just passing through. BraveStarr, however, catches sight of a medallion hanging round Parluk’s neck – a medallion which depicts the strength of the bear. Parluk explains that his medallion has been in his family for generations, and when BraveStarr reveals that he has an identical medallion, Parluk theorises that maybe they are relatives. That may be so, but it’s also not outside the realms of possibility that Parluk’s ancestors and BraveStarr’s ancestors simply both went shopping at the same tacky jewellers.
BraveStarr now goes off on one about it being imperative that Parluk meet the Shaman, a prospect which Parluk greets with a notable lack of enthusiasm. He eventually acquiesces, but then BraveStarr voices the added caveat that no one except BraveStarr himself is allowed on Star Peak to visit the Shaman, so Parluk must wait in town. At this demanding and insane proposal, Parluk reasonably enough tells BraveStarr to piss off, and goes to catch the next bus out of town.
BraveStarr gets himself into a right tizzy over what he should do next, overlooking the obvious: ring the Shaman up and tell him to teleport himself into town pronto, before Parluk leaves. Instead, BraveStarr decides to simply take Parluk to Star Peak without waiting for the Shaman’s permission, and this is of course a big mistake, because Parluk is one of Tex Hex’s mates, equipped with a phony medallion. His big plan is to gain entry to Star Peak and put out the Ceremonial Fire, which will allow Stampede to take over New Texas, or some such wazzockery.
Through a variety of dim-witted tests, the Shaman instantly detects that Parluk is lying, but because he’s a first class moron, he takes BraveStarr away into another room to impart this information, thus giving Parluk precisely the opportunity he needs to put out the fire. With the fire reduced to ashes, the Shaman starts to fade into non-existence, though on the plus side, he does put on a hilarious growly voice for no particularly evident reason.
BraveStarr spends the next minute or two howling about his idiocy and whinging that he can’t relight the fire. I’m presuming there’s some mystical reason he can’t pop off to Sainsbury’s and buy some kerosene and matches, though of course he may just be being more stupid than usual. Anyway, the situation is resolved when Fuzz finds a still-glowing ember of the fire, and BraveStarr uses it to relight the flame, after which the Shaman shimmers back into existence and Parluk gets taken away for an all expenses paid stay at BraveStarr’s notorious off shore detention centre.
In today’s adventure…
Thirty/Thirty and Fuzz gabble out some rubbish that could – if you’re feeling generous – be interpreted as dispensing a moral about stranger danger. There’s also some waffle about Fuzz carving a totem pole, in case you’re interested.
Character checklist
Enthusiastically leaping onto our screens today are BraveStarr, Thirty/Thirty, Judge JB, the Shaman, Fuzz, Handlebar, Doc Clayton, some horrible children, Parluk, Tex Hex, Stampede, Thunderstick and Cactus Head, though again most of these people don’t have much to contribute.
Unnecessarily Violent Horse
It’s not exactly out of the ordinary, but I suppose it’s worth noting that Thirty/Thirty tries to murder Thunderstick by shooting the ground out from under him while he’s standing on the edge of a cliff. Surely it’s time he gets a disciplinary hearing.
Insults
It’s all very quiet on this front until the end of the episode, when BraveStarr suddenly lets loose and addresses Parluk as “lying vermin”. Thirty/Thirty evidently reasons that if BraveStarr’s insulting Parluk, it must be okay, so he gets in on the act by telling Parluk he’s a “sneaky varmint”.
Strength of the Bear
There’s a distinctly odd scene in this episode, in which Handlebar indulges in an irrelevant flashback about a time BraveStarr used the strength of the bear to dig some wells for a bunch of thirsty lions. I’m really not sure why this scene is here. The bear strength also gets a saner outing towards the end of the episode, when BraveStarr needs to use it to keep Tex Hex out of Star Peak.
Starr Rating
Well, it definitely needed a few rewrites before it made it to screen, but at its heart, this is a reasonably decent episode. It gives us more information than we’ve ever had before on why the Shaman is necessary – allegedly, the Ceremonial Fire is the only thing preventing Stampede and Tex Hex from taking over New Texas, and thus I can understand a bit more why it’s so important for BraveStarr to keep them away from Star Peak. The episode also gives us a sense of history for BraveStarr and the Shaman; it seems they’re part of a tribe of which they are the only known remaining population.
On the other hand, the episode contrives to make Judge JB act like a complete div: she sees Tex Hex and Parluk chatting in town, and doesn’t seem to do anything about it till nearly 10 minutes later, by which time it’s almost too late. As noted, there’s also a very strange scene for Handlebar, which must have been there for some purpose in an earlier draft, but just seems enormously random in the finished product. All in all, though, let’s call this one a minor success.
BraveStarr Episode Review Site 